S'mores Life

Laura Reeve Photography I was going through my blog posts the other day, and stumbled upon this post about being a mom of two  and how it was all okay despite my fears, and I was reassured of that fact because of a sweet moment between my two girls. I guess it came at the exact right time, because right now in this season of motherhood? I'm tired. I'm burnt out. I'm cranky. I'm not handling things well. I'm beating myself up for every mistake. I'm yelling too much. I'm overwhelmed. My kids are cranky, tired, misbehaving, testing boundaries, being kids and some days I just think...how does anyone do this, well? It's easy to become a parent (if you're lucky), its relatively easy to keep them alive (much easier now that Haddie has glasses and isn't falling and running into things all the time...here I thought she just inherited my gracefulness) but it's so freaking hard to parent them well. It's a lot of pressure. I'm feeling jud...

Weekly-ish...bi-weekly...Whatever, I'm confessing. Maybe not as regularly as I'd planned, but surely not for a lack of confessions, I am almost always embarrassingly full of those... This evening (which is actually what prompted me to write this) I learned what it's like to want to murder your husband. Not in a crazy, I will kill you in your sleep way...no in a, I love you dearly but YOU MUST DIE RIGHT NOW way. He got home from work as I'm putting Clara to bed and he starts banging around the kitchen and then the bathroom (which shares a wall w/ her crib - shows how much we were thinking about homicide and a baby sleeping when putting it up) like he wanted to let our friends 20 miles away know he was home...She was *finally* asleep when he stumbled his way into the shower making enough noise to wake her up through the wall. This man that I married, made and have begun to raise a child with - I actually wanted to hurt him. I had to go put Clara back to sleep not only...

I apologize in advance for the number of typos that are probably in here...it's taking forever to proofread so I'm hitting post long before I probably should. :) I am nervous to write this. I am nervous to post this. This will probably take me a few sessions to write, just because it's so long, detailed, and emotional. And awhile ago, like Clara's Birth Story , I should have written it earlier...but it has taken a lot of reflection to get to where I'm at now. I would like to be asked for grace, understanding, and not be judged for what I am about to write and for posting it. I may be sharing it with the world, but it's a very personal story. I know some will wonder what the big deal is, some will judge me for some of the choices I made, and some will think I'm over-analyzing things. But someone, one woman, maybe two or three, will understand my journey and appreciate knowing someone else went through something similar. So after writing this for myself, I a...

During my pregnancy I talked to other moms and researched the heck out of baby gear while I created my registry and made purchase after purchase. Ian still tells the story to everyone "Every day I came home from work, there was another package at our door!" In reality most of those packages were diapers or household supplies purchased from amazon.com with the free 2-day shipping I had throughout most of my pregnancy, but he likes to think that I bought every baby item out there. ;) I did buy a lot, and I registered for a lot and thanks to our generous family and friends received a great deal of those items off our registry. I'm hoping this list of what helped us survive (and thrive and enjoy, of course!) Clara's first six months might help another mom out there who is wondering why there are seven varieties of a single bouncy chair. ;) In another follow-up post I'll blog about what we purchased that we could have gone without. And of course, every baby is differen...

Sometimes after I do something I know I would never find myself doing a year ago, I think to myself about how much life has changed. A lot of these things I think happen to every mom out there, but some pertain to just being a SAHM. Either way, I hope other moms out there can relate! You know you're a (sleep deprived, stay at home) mom, when... You can't remember the last time you wore pants that buttoned, as opposed to an elastic waist. You get extremely frustrated at the self check-out at Safeway for not accepting your coupon when an employee points out to you that you are attempting to use a Giant coupon. You can't remember what it feels like to sleep for more than five or six hours at a time. In fact, if you get four hours straight and six hours total in a night, you feel like you could run a marathon. If only your body remembered how to run... The last time you bought something for yourself, it involved a huge panel waist and a "Motherhood Maternity...

My first official blog post! I feel like this should be more exciting than it is. As it is, I am wearing sweat pants that my 5 month old peed on (a few hours ago, and yes, I have yet to take them off. This should tell you a lot about me already), listening to my hubby chuckle to his book in bed behind me, and contemplating whether or not I'll take a shower after this or (more likely) attempt some rare sleep. For a quick intro to all my readers out there (Ha, ha...) My name is Erynne, I am a wife to my loving and kind of strange husband Ian, and a stay at home mommy to my beautiful and funny daughter Clara. We are originally from Alaska but are currently "displaced" (aka permanent residents in denial) in Maryland and have been so for over four years now. I hope writing this blog will provide some much needed "me" time and help me decompress my thoughts about being a new mommy and life in general. If some readers find me along the way, that'd be pretty fun t...